One a day, better than apples.

I’ve always wanted to be in a high-speed pursuit. I’ve literally got the production all mapped out in my head: The setting will be European, the soundtrack will be by Prodigy and the script will consist of the line “Let them eat cake” repeated over and over between manic laughter.

Oh yea, sorry, I forgot to warn you baby. Don’t ever look Santa in the eye or he’ll drag you to his labor camps in the Arctic Ocean. My bad, my bad. 

“Oh that is IT!! Take your soft-cooked Italian pasta hugs and go to hell! I hate you seaweed!”

Uck. The ocean. Sure, sure, it’s got it’s virtues - but it’s pretty much a giant toilet. And I know I’m not the first to point that out, so how about this: those people who died in the Titanic? They’re in there. K, I’m gonna splash you in the mouth now.